Looming Doubt

Startled, I find he has been standing over me in my lowest moments, whispering negative nothings in my ear.  When I find myself singing with delight at something wondrous I have created, one look from him and without a fight or even a whimper I fold back within myself, taking my creation with me. At times, I wish to speak my truth he shakes his head laughing and I become silent. Before I can take the first step in a new direction, he grasps me by the hand and coldly guides me back to the place I began…a lonely, painful place. He comes when I’m up and he comes when I’m down. He comes when I least expect him, though I should know better by now. Looming Doubt spreads out his dark tentacles, covered in hooks of despair and instantly I feel completely uncertain of who I am and what is to become of me…lost.

Without me, Looming Doubt is nothing. It is I who empowers him. I forget this and allow him to shadow me. I cannot be rid of him, but I can diminish him. Turn away when he beckons. Pay no mind to his endless queries. Turn a deaf ear to his laughter at my expense. Forgive and forget the trespasses of others, for this only fuels the fire that feeds his moldy soul. Appreciate the sweetness, beauty, and wonder of my life. Reclaim my power and watch him fall. The best defense is to believe in myself utterly and then every breath I take is a success and every moment I spend in this world is a joy.


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